Have you ever wondered why people always seem to be the best before you are in a relationship with them? A man always seem so perfect and so idea but the moment you say ‘yes’ you then start seeing their true colours. I say this because about 6 months ago I met this wonderful man who seemed to have everything planned and had potential but soon showed me that he was an ‘animal’
I had just finished college and starting my new job when I met Ted. We worked together he was my senior and I thought he was very handsome. He invited me to dinner 1 night and I agreed as I thought he was the best of all the man I had dated. Ted seemed gentle and innocent and in no time I had agreed to be in a relationship with him.
Lucky for us we were allowed to be in a relationship with our work mates and I did not care if everyone at work knew that I (Joan) and Ted were an item. What surprised me the most is he got so angry when he heard me telling people in the office that he (Ted) and I were in a relationship. I asked him why he was angry but he just said it was not yet time to let others know.
Like in every office or work place there is always that person who talks too much or knows everything about everyone. In our office her name was Rosie, one day she came up to me and said:
Rosie: Are you sure about Ted?
Me: he seems nice and I like him a lot, I think I actually love him.
Rosie: I am sorry to tell you this but everyone here knows that Ted is not the love type. He is more of a one night stand.
Me: (angrily) and why are you telling me this, do you also love him and you are jealous?
Rosie: hahaha not that animal, you will see his true colours trust me you will.
With that Rosie left and I wondered why she had said that about Ted but then I just shrugged it away as her being jealous. I tried asking Ted about why everyone thinks he is an animal but he just said to be careful not to listen to jealous people, and I bought it. I mean I was blinded by love.
We were in the relationship now for 3 months and Ted suggested we move in together and I saw no problem with that. We seemed happy to everyone and Rosie actually came back to me and said that she thinks that Ted was now a changed man. I thanked her and went my way.
Things changed when we moved in together, I had said to Ted that we will only have sex after marriage and he had said he would wait. Funny enough when we were at his house he started acting roughly towards me and trying to seduce me, when I said no to his advances he got so angry. He was angry for days and didn’t even eat the food I prepared for him. We had different bedrooms so I was not worried about him until one day in the middle of the night he broke my bedroom door and came in. Like always I said no sex before marriage and again he got so angry and threw me out of his house. It was in winter and I slept outside in the cold.
The night cold got me thinking, I mean we were not even married and now he is already treating me like this. I wondered if Rosie was telling the truth, I wondered if he really was an animal and was starting to show his true colours. I had no one to answer these questions for me.
In the morning he opened the door and started acting all loving and caring. I asked him, “How in your crazy mind can one show love and affection to someone that they let sleep outside?” It was my turn now to get angry and I didn’t even want to talk to him. I told him that I am leaving and going back to my place and he snapped and hit me hard. I fell and hit the wall and was admitted into the hospital for 3 days.
At the hospital I lied that I had an accident as I didn’t want him to get arrested, I loved him. He even came to visit me and took care of me until I was discharged. He took me back to his house and pretended to be loving and caring but by now I knew the real him. He really was an animal and didn’t respect others, his true colours reviewed.
Today I write this story in my hospital bed recovering, this time he wanted to kill me for real. Like always the arguments started when he wants sex, I said no like always and he attacked me and forced himself on me, even tried to rape me. I tried to fight back but he was too strong for me. He raped me and beat me up bad I ended up in ICU. I woke up after 5 days and this time I didn’t lie I reported him to the police and he was arrested.
I have been in the hospital for 10 days now and am recovering, I wonder what I really saw in Ted and why was I so blind not to see all this. To all the ladies out there never stay with a man that beats you? And to all you man, if you love your woman you will be patient with them and you will never beat them.
Real love doesn’t not lie or cheat or hit others, it is patient and always there. Yes you might lie today to get the girl but if you love them you will learn to be patient with them and do everything to make them happy.
Thank you I hope I help those in the same scenario as mine to make better decisions, I know I have made up my mind I am not going back to that animal.